dimanche 15 février 2009

 

Faire semblant...

Il faut faire semblant que ça va, alors qu'à l'intérieur on est dévasté.
Si on pleure, on nous dit; "Pense aux deux autres"! Oui, j'y pense, mais j'ai quand même le droit de penser AUSSI à ma Pépette, quand même!
Sous pretexte, que les funérailles sont passées, il faudrait, pour les autres, reprendre ma vie comme si de rien n'était.
Mon chagrin dérange, même mes proches, et j'en ai marre.
Hier, de rage impuissante, je me suis coupé (taillé, devrais-je dire) les cheveux. On dirait un épouvantail, mais je m'en fous, ça m'a soulagée, quelque part.
Mon mari et mes enfants l'ont mal pris.
Je m'en fous.
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Comments:
Personne ne te demande de faire semblant, Simonne. Je ne sais pas si le chagrin dérange les autres. Je ne crois pas que ce soit ça. Déjà, la plupart des gens ont peur de parler et de penser à la mort.
Chacun a une manière, je pense, d'entrer en deuil, de le faire.
Je comprends de l'extérieur ce que veulent dire, peut-être maladroitement, les gens qui te disent de penser à tes deux autres enfants. Ils veulent signifier qu'il faut vivre, ils essaient de te tirer vers la vie. Et c'est vrai que tes deux autres enfants ont besoin de toi, plus que jamais peut-être. Cela ne signifie pas pour autant que tu n'aies pas le droit d'avoir de la peine, d'être dévastée, en colère. Tu as tous ces droits. Mais tu es vivante.
 
Hélas...
 
Simonne, tu as tous les droits, sauf de dire cela. Il y a un certain nombre de gens qui ont besoin de toi sur cette terre et qui t'aiment.
 
Simonne
je suis tellement desolée et triste d'apprendre la mort de Gabrielle.
Je te comprends meme quand tu dis helas.Faudrait peut etre pas dire ca mais comment mentir je suis aussi mere d'un enfant fragile qui est au centre de ma vie.
Je te souahite bcp d'energie et je pense a votre famille,je pense que l'amour que vous avez les uns pour les autres et pour Gaby vous aidera beaucoup.

je pense a vous et a la petite ange gaby.

bises

anahita
 
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